


A Father's Darkest Timeline

by theraccoonloon



Category: Cats - Andrew Lloyd Webber, Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats - T. S. Eliot
Genre: Chaos twins are playing a prank, Father-Daughter Relationship, Fluff, Gen, Munk may die young at this rate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 15:21:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29280636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theraccoonloon/pseuds/theraccoonloon
Summary: There's chaos in the junkyard, someone needs to teach the kids Street Smarts, and Munkustrap is a very tired DadAlternatively: I heard some audio and all I could think about is the struggles of fatherhood
Relationships: Jemima & Munkustrap (Cats), Mungojerrie & Rumpleteazer (Cats)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 23





	A Father's Darkest Timeline

**Author's Note:**

> You've probably seen this but: https://youtu.be/3L2mC_7F5n8
> 
> You're welcome. That is the whole basis of this whole shindig. I hope you like fatherhood and pranks and Bombalurina ready to shank someone.

It’s surprisingly much easier to kidnap Jemima than one would think. It’s hard to call it kidnapping, in fact, with how easy it is. Jemima did nothing but let out a small giggle when they burst onto the scene of the playing kits and scooped her up. Frankly, it was a worrying comment on her self-preservation skills that she didn’t fight at all.

Now, Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer had Jemima sitting in front of them, looking up at them with her big, innocent eyes, in an alleyway somewhere.

“Our prank can’t just be hiding Jemima for a bit.” Teazer whispers to Jerrie.

“We can’t duct tape her to a fire hydrant like we did Pouncival.” Jerrie whispers back. 

“There’s got to be somethin’ brilliant to do. We could ‘old her upside down and ‘alf the junkyard will lose their minds about it.” Teazer taps her foot and rubs her chin. “I’ve an idea. You ‘ave to watch the kid while I see if we ‘ave the stuff.”

“Teazer, aw no, don’t go-” She’s gone. “Well then. Guess I’m with child.” Jemima is still staring at him with her wide eyes. He hopes he used that term right.

He crouches in front of her, squinting. He waves his hand in front of her eyes, she follows it. Well, at least that proves that she’s alive. He pokes her face, drawing a small squeak from her. He tugs on her collar.Spiked. Huh.. Her fur was much messier than he had expected. 

“Do you know ‘’oo I am?” He picks her up, to a very giggly reaction, “I”m Mungo-”

“-Jerrie and Rumpleteazer!” The kit finishes, almost bursting from his grip. He frowns. It was pretty close.

“Yeah, but, just me. I’m Mungo-”

“-Jerrie and Rumpleteazer! Notorious cappla’cats!” Jemima cuts him off again, twisting and writhing. At least the notorious thing was turning out to be true. He looks around the alleyway and places Jemima down on top of some trash bags. He pokes it a few times first to make sure it’s soft enough for a kit before he places Jemima down, gently. Probably should avoid hurting her whatever the plan is. 

“Stay.” He commands. Jemima nods, beaming. Something in his brain felt like it was scheming, but he needed something.

“Jerrie!” Comes Teazer’s excited voice from the end of the alleyway,“I’ve found some of our recent steals and I think we can frame Jemima for somethin’ that’ll really get Munkey’s blood going, I just know it!”

Jerrie looks her over, tapping his chin. Trying to help his half formed idea blossom into a proper scheme. His eyes catch on her pearls in the lamplight. “To ‘ell with that idea. I have a better one! .” 

Teazer bounces on her toes as she comes to a stop in front of him. “A better idea?” She gives her brother a quizzical look. 

“I think I can make Munk’s blood boil so ‘ot that it’ll evaporate.” He says in lieu of a full explanation. “First, we need to find out ‘ow much fuzzball ‘ere can ‘andle.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Junkyard was in chaos. Etcetera, Electra, and Victoria had come bounding in shouting about Jemima disappearing “like magic.” Munkustrap was trying his absolute best to draw out a more coherent explanation from the frightened girls when Bombalurina began throwing some interesting remarks Alonzo’s way about how he was “supposed to be watching the kits.”

Munkustrap didn’t even really break up that fight. It came to an end when Demeter stepped out of the den looking to be on the brink of passing out from nerves. That occupied Bomba enough that Munk could begin to focus on creating a search party.

“I can’t find Coricopat or Tantomile either.” Plato reports with a little salute. “I checked out everywhere on my way and I didn’t see Jemima anywhere at all.” 

Munk rubs his forehead, letting out a shaky breath. “Okay, that’s fine. Grab George and begin searching for any trace of her scent.” He turns back to the girls. “Can you tell me what you saw?”

Electra rubs her tear-stained eyes “There was just an orange blur and then poof! Jemmy was gone.” She says between sniffles. 

“She’s not been taken by Macavity, has she?” Etcetera asks innocently. Munkustrap looks around and picks her up holding her close.

“No, nothing like that, Cettie. I’m sure Jemmy is just admiring some flowers somewhere. You guys will be playing together by tomorrow, I swear.” He tells her with a little boop to the nose. “Do you remember hearing anything strange?” He asks softly. The only response he received was the shaking of heads.

He puts the kit back down and gets up. Skimbleshanks is next on his list of people to talk to. He grabs onto Jenny as he passes by, pointing at the distressed kittens. She nods her head, before bustling off. “Hopefully, Skimble is back from the train station already.” Munkustrap mutters to himself. “After that, Ill have to see if Demeter is okay. Then I can start looking for Jemima myself."

He pauses when he feels a weight on his shoulder, and turns around to see the concerned face of Tugger.. “Anywhere specific you want me to look? I’m going to see if Mistoffelees can magic her back.” He asks him. The gray tom shakes his head. Tugger gives him a few firm pats to the shoulder before stepping off. 

“Everlasting Cat, please let Jemima be somewhere safe.” Munkustrap prays, silently to himself

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Good job, Jemmy!”

“Make sure you keep your legs straight on that flip! You sure are gettin’ it!”

“We’ll do it one more time. From the top!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Kittens don’t just vanish into thin air, Munk. If we need to bring the wrath of hell on Macavity, so be it.” Bombalurina was one to possess a ceaseless wealth of anger when the situation called for it.

He sighs. “Bomba, we don’t want to provoke Macavity unless we know for sure he has her. I doubt he has moved into the business of quietly stealing kits.” Munkustrap lets out a tired yawn. The sun has since set and they haven’t found a single clue. Where on earth was Jemima?

“Do you really want to take your chances on that?” Bombalurina hisses before storming off.

It just can’t be Macavity. Munkustrap doesn’t want to consider it an option. Not until all the other ones have been exhausted. There just isn’t a single clue pointing towards anything. Even with the kittens perfectly calm, they couldn’t tell him anything more. 

He rubs his eyes. The grey tom knows he won’t be sleeping tonight.

_SMASH!_

The sound of glass being smashed echoes across the walls of the junkyard. Munkustrap freezes and waits for _it._

“Macavity!” Demeter calls from somewhere, clear as day. 

Munkustrap charges to the center of the junkyard. Cats scrambling all over it in a panic. He looks around. Skimble had a hand on the kits. Good, he can look for that bastard properly. Alonzo comes near enough he can whisper some orders to get everyone away from the center of Junkyard. Alonzo nods, shooing off any cat that hadn't fled already.

A figure leaps up on top of the TSE-01. Another one scrambles up next to the first, much smaller.

“Mungojerrie and...” Munkustrap relaxes, it was just the twins starting some chaos again. Thank The Everlasting Cat.

“Rumpleteazer!” Munkustrap almost jumps out of his skin. That was very much the wrong voice to hear next. 

“We’re a notorious couple of cats!” He looks up to what he wishes he won’t see. There’s Jerrie, alright. Just as expected. Munk shivers at what’s standing next to him. There’s a little ball of red and black fluff, wearing a pair of orange thigh highs,which practically looked like water waders on her. Pearls glint from her neck as she sings as loud as her small body lets her.

Maybe this is what having a stroke feels like.

He watches the two of them dance; he’s far too paralyzed with confusion for anything else. Mungojerrie and Jemima dance through the familiar number. Jemima’s little highkicks barely swinging higher than Jerrie’s knee. She hesitates before falling into a silly somersault when Jerrie cartwheels. It would be impressive if there wasn’t something so deeply concerning about its implication. 

Jerrie picks his LittleTeazer up and tosses her a few feet in the air. 

Oh, great, now he’s having a heart attack too. 

Jerrie and Jem scoot forwards on their knees a little, with mirroring grins. “And the family will say,” Jemima scrunches her face up as she pushes a growl into her voice for the next line, “It’s that 'orrible cat!”

Munkustrap lunges forward, scooping Jemima up and into his arms. That was enough of that. Jerrie jumps to his feet and takes a few steps back. The lecture he’s about to unleash on this boy and his sister wherever she is will be one for the history books. Jemima squeals and wraps her arms around him. 

“I danced! I danced!” She says excitedly “Did you like my song? We practiced all day!” 

Munk’s heart melts. “You did dance and you sang. I am very proud of you. You did a great job.” His praise gets him a tighter hug and a squeal from Jemima. He glares at Jerrie, he’ll get him later.

“Teazer taught me how to somersault and Jerrie can throw me really high! Can I play with them tomorrow?”

‘Absolutely not,’ he thinks as he smiles at his precious girl. “Maybe some other time. How about you run off to your mother and tell her all about your day. I’m sure she’s with Auntie Bomba too.” Jemima clings to his legs a little before running off. 

Jerrie smiles at him sheepishly. Teazer had crawled out of wherever she was hiding and gave Munk a nervous wave. He looks between the two of them and then over at Jemima, waddling away in the thigh highs. He rubs his temples to ease his ever-worsening headache.

“Munk, we-” Teazer begins.

“-I don’t want to hear it from either of you. Just promise me I’ll never have to see that again.”

The twins look at each other, experiencing one of their moments of quick agreements. They nod to Munk eagerly. “Of course, Munk. Mum’s the word.” They say together, miming zipping their mouths shut. 

Munkustrap turns around, rubbing his eyes. He’s not really sure what just happened, but he’s sure that he wants to forget it. He shivers, Jemima growing up into one of _them._ If he never thought about it again, it would be too soon.

**Author's Note:**

> I wish I would stop writing too LOL. 
> 
> Anyways, thanks for reading. Comment if it pleases you. I hope I'll be able to post more this week.  
> Check me out at: acatpersonapparently.tumblr.com  
> (Thanks to A-cat-is-not-a-dog.tumblr.com. They edited this and they are also my hero)


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